Even good marriages encounter difficult times. It’s not a matter of “if” but “when.”
Most couples experience difficulties in their relationship at fairly predictable times…
- Shortly after the honeymoon, the newly-weds realize how different the person they married really is.
- When the first baby arrives, the couple realizes how much their lives have changed – forever!
- When it’s time to decide who helps with homework, while the other cleans up after dinner.
- When the first – or last – child leaves home.
Most couples experience difficulties in their relationship over fairly common issues…
- Money: who makes it and who spends it?
- Time and activities: How much together time vs. alone time?
- Housework: who cooks, does the dishes, cleans the house, does the laundry, pays the bills?
- Sex: Who initiates? How often?
- Recreation: Together? Alone or with others?
- In-laws: How involved are they in the couple’s life?
The good news is most couples are able to resolve conflicts like these on their own. They don’t need a professional to help them sort things out.
Many other marriages have benefited from discussing their challenges with someone specially trained to listen, understand and help them through their rough spot.
How to know if your relationship could benefit from talking with a counselor:
Drs. John and Julie Gottman have found that couples in distress have a predictable set of dysfunctional – and painful – habits. Ask yourself:
- Is there more negativity than positivity in your relationship?
- Are the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse – Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt, and Stonewalling – running rampant in your interactions?
- Are you able to repair your relationship while in a conflict?
- Are you experiencing negative emotional flooding and emotional distancing from one another?
- Have your conflicts become chronic, too complex, or too overwhelming?
If this describes your relationship, the sooner you get help, the sooner you can be enjoying life together again.
For over 25 years, I’ve helped couples identify and address the core issues in their conflicts.
The Gottman Method of Couples Therapy is one of the tools I use to help couples
Read more about the Gottman Method here
Working together, my clients and I analyze their strengths and growth areas. Together, we develop a strategy to help you overcome these obstacles and getting your relationship back on track.
Each session is structured around meeting the goals you have identified.
When couples work together to resolve the issues that have divided them, they can build the strong, warm, and satisfying relationship both of them want.
Contact me if you’re ready to get started.
One tragically common experience that deserves special attention is infidelity.
Infidelity can happen any number of ways:
- a physical or emotional involvement,
- a one night stand (or many one night stands),
- visiting a chat room,
- viewing or posting an ad on a dating website,
- surfing online pornography.
Whatever form it takes, infidelity inflicts a serious wound on a marriage.
Infidelity does not have to mean the end of your marriage. Many couples have survived infidelity by facing it directly and honestly.
If you’ve experienced infidelity in your marriage – whether you’re the person who strayed or the one who was betrayed – it is important to get help today.
Call me today.
I help couples succeed in their most important relationships.